Class
There are six distinct main classes in the Kingdom of Loathing, as well as other special classes. Each centers around one of three main stats, and each has a different set of skills to use.
Main Classes
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Seal Clubbers hail from the frigid Northlands, because one character class always hails from the frigid Northlands. They rely on their Muscle to survive.
Main Stat: Muscle Play Style: Seal clubbers hit things with sticks until those things stop moving. Features:
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The Turtle Tamer's mystical connection with his/her terrapin brethren imbues him/her with great power. (S)he excels at moving very slowly and winning footraces with smug satisfaction. His/her Muscle is the key to his/her success, and to his/her long lifespan.
Main Stat: Muscle Play Style: Turtle Tamers fight with the aid of their animal companions and the magical blessings of Ancient Turtle Spirits. They also cast protective shells around their fellow Adventurers. Features: |
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With his/her mastery of the arcane secrets of Noodlecraft, the Pastamancer is a force to be reckoned with. (S)he relies on his/her Mysticality to get ahead in the world.
Main Stat: Mysticality Play Style: Pastamancers cast powerful spells while hiding behind their enthralled undead pasta minions. Features:
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Long engaged in an uneasy truce with the Pastamancers, the guild of Saucerors protects the secrets of the Ancient Brotherhood of Gravymakers. Their Mysticality is their most important attribute.
Main Stat: Mysticality Play Style: Saucerors cast devastating spells and conjure protective sauces around themselves and other Adventurers. Features: |
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The Disco Bandit boogies to and fro, hither and yon. Whence comes (s)he? No man knows. Whither strikes (s)he next? All men live in fear of him/her and his/her Moxie.
Main Stat: Moxie Play Style: Disco Bandits dance out of reach of their foes while also sneakily stabbing them. Features:
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The scourge of mariachis and polka bands, the Accordion Thieves have plied their malign craft since time out of mind. Their Moxie serves them well in both their adventures and their interactions with "the ladies/gentlemen."
Main Stat: Moxie Play Style: Accordion Thieves steal accordions, which they then use to fight their opponents and play helpful songs for other Adventurers. Features:
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Challenge Run Classes
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You're filled with the spirit of Boris, the voracious, ferocious, and prestigious Legendary Warrior of the Times of Old. Armed with only your trusty axe Trusty and your faithful minstrel Clancy, you'll use an entirely new set of skills to defeat the Sorceress.
Main Stat: Muscle Features:
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The dead are rising! Okay, it's been known to happen from time to time -- zombies aren't exactly rare in the Kingdom -- but this time it's serious! Take up arms to fight the undead hordes, before the entire Kingdom falls to a zombie apocalypse!
Main Stat: Muscle Features:
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You're filled with the spirit of Jarlsberg, the Legendary Wizard of the Times of Old. Armed with the secrets of the cosmos, you'll use an entirely new set of powerful spells to devastate your foes.
Main Stat: Mysticality Features:
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You're filled with the spirit of Sneaky Pete, the Legendary Cool Guy of the Times of Old. Armed with sneaky thief skills and a cool talking motorcycle, you'll be the toast of the town.
Main Stat: Moxie Features:
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Ed the Undying is back -- not that he ever left, really -- and he is super annoyed with a certain adventurer who stole something from him. Recover his/your property (yes, the perspective shift is even more confusing than usual on this one) with ancient curses, powerful spells, mummified servants, and the jackal-headed demons of the Underworld.
Main Stat: Mysticality Features:
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Cow Punchers let their fists do the talking. They never missed with unarmed attacks, and their hardiness and survival skills were unparallelled.
Main Stat: Muscle | ||||
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Beanslingers were the Chef-Magi of the time. With their mastery of spellcraft and their love of a good bean, they were forces to be reckoned with.
Main Stat: Mysticality | ||||
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Snake Oilers were the swindlers and scientists of their day. As fast with a sixgun as they were with a potion, they could shoot a hole in you and then patch it up before you even had a chance to bleed.
Main Stat: Moxie |
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You're a gelatinous cube with aspirations of humanity. Hungrily absorb items to gain power!
Main Stat: Moxie Features:
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Live a grim facsimile of life as a powerful Vampyre.
Main Stat: Mysticality Features:
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Jump, Hammer and Fireball your way through the Kingdom. Just like a plumber!
Main Stat: None Features:
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Resistance is goo-tile.
Main Stat: None Features:
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As accomplished athletes, Pig Skinners user their Muscles to solve problems.
Main Stat: Muscle | ||||
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As trained Chef-Magi, Cheese Wizards use their intellect and Mysticality to accomplish their goals.
Main Stat: Mysticality | ||||
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Masters of syncopation and improvisation, Jazz Agents use their rhythm and Moxie to move through the world in style.
Main Stat: Moxie |
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You are a kindly profressor[sic] inflicted with a horrible curse.
Main Stat: Muscle Features:
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Astral Spirit
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Features:
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Notes
- Cristobal Colon (#1492), the mythical source of the comfy blankets, is a level 23 Seal Clubber, but has the class title of "Explorer" (quotes included), rather than the standard title of "Seal Clubber".
- The Toot Oriole (#7007) has no distinct class, but has the class title of "Helpful Bird (NPC)" and a Disco Bandit tattoo.
- Don Pygoscelis (#176862) is a level 11 Accordion Thief (a Sub-Apprentice Accordion Thief).
- Uncle Crimbo (#666) is a level 11 Seal Clubber (a Reindeer Threatener). The account creation date shows that he was born on December 25, 0.
- Radiobugbear (#493540) is a level 1 Seal Clubber (a Lemming Trampler)
- The Ghost of the English Language (#800) is a level 1 Astral Spirit, and as a result has no definitive class.
- The RNG has a class title of "Inscrutable Force", and a variable level and playerid.
- Enraged Cow (#31513) has a class title of "Hope Crusher (NPC)" and a Seal Clubber tattoo.