Class

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There are six distinct main classes in the Kingdom of Loathing, as well as other special classes. Each centers around one of three main stats, and each has a different set of skills to use.

Main Classes

Seal Clubber
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Seal Clubbers hail from the frigid Northlands, because one character class always hails from the frigid Northlands. They rely on their Muscle to survive.

Main Stat: Muscle

Play Style: Seal clubbers hit things with sticks until those things stop moving.

Features:

Turtle Tamer
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The Turtle Tamer's mystical connection with his/her terrapin brethren imbues him/her with great power. (S)he excels at moving very slowly and winning footraces with smug satisfaction. His/her Muscle is the key to his/her success, and to his/her long lifespan.

Main Stat: Muscle

Play Style: Turtle Tamers fight with the aid of their animal companions and the magical blessings of Ancient Turtle Spirits. They also cast protective shells around their fellow Adventurers.

Features:

Pastamancer
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With his/her mastery of the arcane secrets of Noodlecraft, the Pastamancer is a force to be reckoned with. (S)he relies on his/her Mysticality to get ahead in the world.

Main Stat: Mysticality

Play Style: Pastamancers cast powerful spells while hiding behind their enthralled undead pasta minions.

Features:

Sauceror
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Long engaged in an uneasy truce with the Pastamancers, the guild of Saucerors protects the secrets of the Ancient Brotherhood of Gravymakers. Their Mysticality is their most important attribute.

Main Stat: Mysticality

Play Style: Saucerors cast devastating spells and conjure protective sauces around themselves and other Adventurers.

Features:

Disco Bandit
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The Disco Bandit boogies to and fro, hither and yon. Whence comes (s)he? No man knows. Whither strikes (s)he next? All men live in fear of him/her and his/her Moxie.

Main Stat: Moxie

Play Style: Disco Bandits dance out of reach of their foes while also sneakily stabbing them.

Features:

Accordion Thief
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The scourge of mariachis and polka bands, the Accordion Thieves have plied their malign craft since time out of mind. Their Moxie serves them well in both their adventures and their interactions with "the ladies/gentlemen."

Main Stat: Moxie

Play Style: Accordion Thieves steal accordions, which they then use to fight their opponents and play helpful songs for other Adventurers.

Features:

  • Can Pickpocket things
  • Can steal and use accordions
  • Does not have to buy their own accordion
  • Can sneak into other guilds

Challenge Run Classes

Avatar of Boris
Boris avatar.gif Boris avatar f.gif
You're filled with the spirit of Boris, the voracious, ferocious, and prestigious Legendary Warrior of the Times of Old. Armed with only your trusty axe Trusty and your faithful minstrel Clancy, you'll use an entirely new set of skills to defeat the Sorceress.

Main Stat: Muscle

Features:

Zombie Master
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The dead are rising! Okay, it's been known to happen from time to time -- zombies aren't exactly rare in the Kingdom -- but this time it's serious! Take up arms to fight the undead hordes, before the entire Kingdom falls to a zombie apocalypse!

Main Stat: Muscle

Features:

Avatar of Jarlsberg
Jarlsberg avatar.gif Jarlsberg avatar f.gif
You're filled with the spirit of Jarlsberg, the Legendary Wizard of the Times of Old. Armed with the secrets of the cosmos, you'll use an entirely new set of powerful spells to devastate your foes.

Main Stat: Mysticality

Features:

Avatar of
Sneaky Pete
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You're filled with the spirit of Sneaky Pete, the Legendary Cool Guy of the Times of Old. Armed with sneaky thief skills and a cool talking motorcycle, you'll be the toast of the town.

Main Stat: Moxie

Features:

  • Can Pickpocket things
  • Embodies coolness
  • Always has an audience (that constantly watches him)
  • Owns a cool talking motorcycle instead of lame familiars
  • Is a real boozehound
  • Eats very little
Ed the Undying
Ed av1.gif
Ed the Undying is back -- not that he ever left, really -- and he is super annoyed with a certain adventurer who stole something from him. Recover his/your property (yes, the perspective shift is even more confusing than usual on this one) with ancient curses, powerful spells, mummified servants, and the jackal-headed demons of the Underworld.

Main Stat: Mysticality

Features:

Avatar of
West of Loathing
Cow Puncher
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Cow Punchers let their fists do the talking. They never missed with unarmed attacks, and their hardiness and survival skills were unparallelled.

Main Stat: Muscle

Beanslinger
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Beanslingers were the Chef-Magi of the time. With their mastery of spellcraft and their love of a good bean, they were forces to be reckoned with.

Main Stat: Mysticality

Snake Oiler
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Snake Oilers were the swindlers and scientists of their day. As fast with a sixgun as they were with a potion, they could shoot a hole in you and then patch it up before you even had a chance to bleed.

Main Stat: Moxie

Gelatinous Noob
Gelatinousdude.gif
You're a gelatinous cube with aspirations of humanity. Hungrily absorb items to gain power!

Main Stat: Moxie

Features:

  • Can Pickpocket things
  • Cannot eat, drink, or use spleen items
  • Does not receive enchantments from equipment
  • Acquires skills by absorbing items
  • Absorbs equipment to gain its enchantments
Vampyre
Vampyrevatar.gif Vampyrevatar f.gif
Live a grim facsimile of life as a powerful Vampyre.

Main Stat: Mysticality

Features:

  • Has no MP
  • Casts skills with HP
  • Extra Muscles don't increase HP
  • Reduced stomach & liver capacity
  • Can only consume blood products
  • Requires blood to heal
  • Sacrifices Max HP to learn skills
  • Has multiple monstrous forms
  • Ensorcelizes monsters to their aid (instead of familiars)
Plumber
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Jump, Hammer and Fireball your way through the Kingdom. Just like a plumber!

Main Stat: None

Features:

Grey You
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Resistance is goo-tile.

Main Stat: None

Features:

  • Cannot eat, drink, or use spleen items
  • Cannot gain experience
  • Absorbs unique monsters and items for Adventures & stat gains
  • Acquires skills by absorbing monsters
Avatar of
Shadows Over Loathing
Pig Skinner
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As accomplished athletes, Pig Skinners user their Muscles to solve problems.

Main Stat: Muscle

Cheese Wizard
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As trained Chef-Magi, Cheese Wizards use their intellect and Mysticality to accomplish their goals.

Main Stat: Mysticality

Jazz Agent
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Masters of syncopation and improvisation, Jazz Agents use their rhythm and Moxie to move through the world in style.

Main Stat: Moxie

WereProfessor
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You are a kindly profressor[sic] inflicted with a horrible curse.

Main Stat: Muscle

Features:

  • Reduced stomach & liver capacity
  • Owns a nice Cottage
  • Morphs between professor and beast every 50 turns
  • As a Professor:
  • As a WereBeast:
    • Good at finding combat (and combat)
    • Too feral to research or enter shops

Astral Spirit

Astral Spirit
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Features:

Notes

See Also