Dad Sea Monkee

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Dad Sea Monkee
Monster ID 1379
Locations Mer-kin Temple
Hit Points 4200
Attack 42000
Defense 42000
Initiative Always Wins
Meat None
Phylum horror
Elements None
Resistance varies
Monster Parts cable, tank, window
Instant Karma, Star Spawn, Pocket Square of Loathing
Manuel Entry
refreshedit data
Dad Sea Monkee You're fighting Dad Sea Monkee

You step through the door into a silent room with featureless white walls. In the center there sits a massive machine, the source of the noise. Pipes lead from the machine to ports on the blackened walls, pumping strange liquids into and out of the tank. In the tank, floating, almost peacefully, is Dad. His eyes are open but vacant. In them you see your reflection, standing in a tiny room. White. Silent. Black. Deafening.

The room is the machine occupies the room contains the machine contains the room describes the machine creates the room is the machine.

You shake your head and look above the tank, at the window into space. <Clue 1> forms <Clue 2> in the darkness, each more <Clue 3> than the last. <Clue 4> <Clue 5>, <Clue 6> revealing <Clue 7>-dimensional monstrosities.

No. Look again. There is nothing. <Is/Are> your <Clue 8> betraying you? As if on cue, <Clue 9>-sided triangles materialize and then disappear. So impossible that your <Clue 10> throbs.

You have to end this.

Hit Message(s):

The heat of a dying star scorches your <kidney> Ugh! Ugh! Eek! (hot damage)

The chill of infinity coats your <arm> in frost. Brrrrrrrrrrr. (cold damage)

A baleful eye stares at you from the depths of space. Argh! Ugh! Ugh! (spooky damage)

You smell the decaying flesh of an ancient carcass, as big as a thousand thousand suns. Ooh! Ooh! Ow! (stench damage)

A distant nebula's shape is painfully suggestive. Eek! Oof! Ugh! (sleaze damage)

Critical Hit Message:

You blink, and when your eyes open you are on the wrong side of the window. The air is sucked from your lungs. Blood sprays from your eyes and ears. You scream, but, well, you know. Ow! Ugh! Eek!

After Combat

Loathe square.gifYou acquire an item: Pocket Square of Loathing
Starspawn.gifYou acquire an item: Star Spawn
Karma.gifYou acquire an item: Instant Karma
The machine begins to shudder and smoke...


  • See Sea Monkees Quest for the steps required to get here.
  • Before the fight, all your buffs will be removed and you will receive an effect that basically reduces the turn limit to 12. (This buff removal INCLUDES removing timers.)
  • He will do roughly 11% of your HP in damage to you every turn, ignoring elemental resistance.
  • Immune to stunning and staggering:
    Unfazed, your opponent attacks you anyway!
  • On the 12th round of combat with Dad the fight will end early, with the message
    The hole in the world has waited long enough. You collapse in on yourself and are no more.
  • You cannot use combat items; if you try; you get the message:
    I can't I can't I can't. I can't I can't I can't.
  • Immune to all but one elemental (or physical) damage type per round, varying from round to round and from combat to combat. The clues in the 3rd and 4th paragraph of intro text tell you which element will work each round. This is described in a forum post. Several tools exist to translate the clues for you:
  • It is highly recommended to have at least both 1,200 MP and knowledge of all of the Hobopolis 120 MP spells. Knowing Volcanometeor Showeruption and Shrap helps increase your chance of winning.
    • Please note that for MP, you only have three possible equipment slots outside of the Clothing of Loathing to buff it up (back, accessory, shirt). All buffs you have will be removed before the fight begins.
  • He has a hard damage cap of 301 per hit, so bonus spell damage is worthless. At max damage he needs be to hit 14 times to be defeated, which can only be done if you use attacks that hit multiple times per use, such as the Hobopolis 120MP spells, Volcanometeor Showeruption or Shrap.


The Clothing of Loathing - edit
Hateful Habiliment
Hate lens.gif
Lens of Hatred
Hate staff.gif
Staff of Simmering Hatred
Hate stone.gif
Cold Stone of Hatred
Hate pants.gif
Pantaloons of Hatred
Hate slippers.gif
Fuzzy Slippers of Hatred
Hate girdle.gif
Girdle of Hatred
Dad machine.gif
Violent Vestments
Vio lens.gif
Lens of Violence
Vio knife.gif
Pigsticker of Violence
Vio brand.gif
Brand of Violence
Vio pants.gif
Jodhpurs of Violence
Vio boots.gif
Ass-Stompers of Violence
Vio buckle.gif
Novelty Belt Buckle of Violence
Dad Sea Monkee
Clothing of Loathing
Loathe goggles.gif
Goggles of Loathing
Loathe snife.gif
Stick-Knife of Loathing
Loathe scepter.gif
Scepter of Loathing
Loathe jeans.gif
Jeans of Loathing
Loathe boots.gif
Treads of Loathing
Loathe belt.gif
Belt of Loathing
Loathe square.gif
Pocket Square of Loathing
  Hat Weapon (1-Handed) Off-Hand Pants Accessory Accessory Accessory