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Type: Combat
MP Cost: 0

Source: Having plastic vampire fangs equipped.
Price: N/A
Class: N/A
Level: N/A
Effect: Takes HP from enemies to restore HP and MP
When Used:
You vahnt to sahk his blaaaaahd, so you do. It tastes like sucking on a penny, but you do X damage.
  • Against a dude: <He/She/It> stands motionless, gazing transfixed at the darkness swirling behind your eyes. Blaaaah.
HPYou gain Y hit points.
MPYou gain Y Mana Points.


  • This skill can only be used once per combat.
  • X cannot exceed monster HP, though it seems to cap near the 50-70 range. If you use Feed on a monster with less HP than that, X will default to the current remaining monster HP, killing your foe. Y appears to be half X, rounded down.
  • X is on average 5 × <level>, capped at about 55. Variance is roughly +/- <level> + 4.
  • Staggers dude-type monsters.
  • Does physical damage, so only takes 1 HP from physically immune monsters like the chalkdust wraith and the ancient protector spirit.


  • You can almost hear it say, "bite me!" Since you're a bloodsucking fiend, you suck X points' worth of blood from it.It's dirty work, but you do it. Er, Coyote Blue.
  • You engage in some ichory dickery, biting it and sucking its blood for X damage.
  • You can't get blood from a rutabaga. Fortunately, it isn't a rutabaga, so you drain its blood for X damage.
  • You spend a few minutes whining about how you'll never see another sunrise, then bite it for X damage.
  • You chomp into it like a delicious ice cream sundae. Then you make it a sundae, bloody sundae, for X points of damage.
  • You decline to give it the choice you never had, and just drain X points' worth of blood from it.
  • You organize a little blood drive, with you as the collector and sole beneficiary, for X damage.
  • You chomp into it and suck X points' worth of sweet, sweet ichor.
  • You decline to drink any of its sweat or tears, but you go to town on the blood, sucking X damage worth out of it.
  • You wanna do bad things to it, so you suck X points' worth of its true blood.
  • You know, some people claim that a vampire's blood-sucking is just a metaphor for sexual penetration. Try not to think about that while you suck its blood for X damage.
  • You stalk it for a while, sneaking into its house and watching it sleep, then drain X points' worth of blood out of it as the final act.
  • You chomp into it. There will be blood. Oh, yes. There will be blood. X points' worth of blood, to be exact.
  • You never drink wine. Okay, you have the occasional wine cooler, but that hardly counts. Anyway, what you do drink is blood, so you help yourself to some of your foe's, for X damage.


  • A Dirty Job, Bloodsucking Fiends, You Suck, and Bite Me are all novels by Christopher Moore. As is Coyote Blue.
  • The combat message about "wanna do bad things to it" and "true blood" is a reference to the vampire-themed television series True Blood and its theme song Bad Things by Everett Jace.
  • The combat message about sundaes is a reference to the U2 song "Sunday Bloody Sunday"
  • The message stating that "there will be blood" is a reference to the film of the same name.
  • The combat message about "The choice you never had" refers to "Interview with the Vampire" novel and movie.
  • "I never drink . . . wine" was said by Bela Lugosi in the 1931 version of Dracula and has been repeated and paraphrased in other vampire movies.

See Also