Lesser Fruit Golem

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Lesser Fruit Golem
Monster ID 284
Locations Tower Ruins
Hit Points 9
Attack 17
Defense 15
No-Hit 28
Initiative 50
Meat None
Phylum construct
Elements None
Resistance None
Monster Parts arm, leg, torso
grapefruit, grapes, lemon, orange, strawberry
Manuel Entry
refreshedit data
Lesser Fruit Golem You're fighting a Lesser Fruit Golem

This is a golem that Fernswarthy apparently made out of a couple of handfuls of fruit. Wrath in its eyes, it stalks toward you on legs made not of celery, but of grapes.

Hit Message(s):

It swings one banana arm at you and catches you square in the <skull>. Ugh! Ow!

It hits you with an orange. Orange you glad he didn't use a banana? Argh! Oof!

Orange.gifYou acquire an item: orange

He garottes you with a grapevine. Now you're just about to lose your mind, honey honey, yeah. Argh! Eek!

Critical Hit Message:

He kicks you with both of his legs, which are made of grapes. It makes you angry. This must be that "wrath of grapes" thing everybody always talks about. Ow! Oof!

Miss Message(s):

It swings one banana arm at you, but slips on a banana peel from a previously defeated golem.

He tries to bean you with an orange, but misses. Orange you glad he did?

He tries to garotte you with a grapevine, but you'd heard he would try that.

Fumble Message:

He lunges toward you, but you stomp on his foot. This not only distracts him, but it also produces a very, very small amount of wine! (FUMBLE!)

After Combat

Grapefruit.gifYou acquire an item: grapefruit (14.8% chance)*
Grapes.gifYou acquire an item: grapes (15.6% chance)*
Lemon.gifYou acquire an item: lemon (16.1% chance)*
Orange.gifYou acquire an item: orange (16.7% chance)*
Sberry.gifYou acquire an item: strawberry (14.8% chance)*
You gain 3-5 <substat>.

Occurs at Tower Ruins.


  • You may acquire more than one orange per fight from the hit message (unlike Fruit Golem).


  • The grapevine garotte hit text is a reference to the song "I Heard It Through the Grapevine" which was originally written by Barrett Strong and Norman Whitfield, and has been performed by many artists, including Gladys Knight & The Pips and Marvin Gaye. Lyrics include "Oh I'm just about to lose my mind / Honey, honey, yeah".
  • The miss text for the garotte is a reference either to that or the more general use of "the grapevine" to refer to hearsay as an information source.
  • The orange hit text is a reference to a knock-knock joke which ends with "Orange you glad I didn't say banana again?"
  • The critical hit message refers to the the 1939 John Steinbeck novel, The Grapes of Wrath.