Prehistoric spear

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prehistoric spear
prehistoric spear

This is an ancient, aerodynamic spear, which someone made fairly recently in prehistoric times. It's one of those time travel wossnames -- paradoxes, yeah, that's it. Anyway, it's basically a stick with a tooth stuck to one end of it. If you have a wooly mammoth to slay, it's your best option.

Type: ranged weapon (1-handed spear)
Damage: 10 - 20
Moxie Required: 35
Selling Price: 25 Meat.

+5% chance of Critical Hit


(In-game plural: prehistoric spears)
View metadata
Item number: 2115
Description ID: 766246873
View in-game: view
View market statistics

Recipe

Crimbo Rock-30px.gif 1 stick 1 tooth
Equals.gif prehistoric spear

Messages

Eegah! Looks like you hit <it> for X damage with a well-tossed spear. BARF! POW! WHAM!
You shout, "tonga nala tonga!" and hurl your prehistoric spear at <it>. The spear spears <it> like Britney, doing X damage. BOINK! BARF! BOINK!
You throw your caveman spear at <it>, doing X damage. Let's hope no one unfreezes any caveman lawyers to sue you for that. SMACK! KERBLAM! SPLAT!
You throw your prehistoric spear at <it>, beating <its> ass back into the Pleistocene for X damage. BAM! WHAMMO! WHAM!
You throw your prehistoric spear at <it>, raising <its> spear factor by X points. BIFF! BIFF! BAM!

References

  • The use of the word "wossnames" could refer to Sandman #18, "A Midsummer Night's Dream", in which the fairy Peaseblossom refers to his portrayal in Shakespeare's play, saying, "It's one of those wossnames -- travelogue? Nah... Travesty. That's it." Neil Gaiman later referred to the use of the word "travelogue", which didn't exist in Shakespeare's time, as an anachronistic paradox suited to a fairy, who lives outside the timestream.
  • The use of the word "wossnames" and the phrase "made quite recently in prehistoric times" could also be a reference to the Discworld novel The Last Continent, in which Rincewind goes to an Australia-like land and has it explained to him by a talking kangaroo how everything there is ancient, but wasn't there the day before.
  • "Eegah!", from one of the hit messages, is a reference to the 1962 movie of the same name, Eegah!, which starred Richard Kiel as a caveman.
  • "Let's hope nobody unfreezes any caveman lawyers", from one of the hit messages, is a reference to the "Unfrozen Caveman Lawyer" sketch from Saturday Night Live.

See Also

Collection

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