Soused Stuffing Golem
|Soused Stuffing Golem|
|Locations||Appears about every 30 adventures on Drunksgiving|
|Hit Points||75% of Player HP|
|Attack||Player's Buffed Moxie - 3|
|Defense||Player's Buffed Muscle - 3|
This is a golem composed entirely of bread cubes, herbs, and celery soaked in whiskey and green beer. Looks like someone's been hitting the St. Sneaky Pete's Day celebrations pretty hard.
He claps a mushy arm over your face. It's like being smothered with a whiskey-drenched pillow, or hugging your mom. Eek! Argh! Ugh! Argh!
He hits you with a soggy fist. It doesn't hurt, but it's definitely gross. Ow! Oof! Eek! Ouch! (sleaze damage)
He slaps you with a mushy hand and you get some whiskey in your eye. Argh! Ooh! Ugh! Oof!
He stuffs his arm down your throat. Blech! Ow! Ugh! Ow! Ouch!
He falls down on top of you, trapping you beneath a mountain of mushy, boozy bread. Ouch! Ugh! Ow! Ooh!
He tries to suffocate you with a mushy arm, but you breathe through your ears.
He hits you with a soggy fist, but it's too soft to hurt.
He slaps you with a mushy hand. Like suicide, it's painless. Unlike suicide, it doesn't kill you.
He tries to stuff you like a turkey, but you're not having any of that stuff.
He collapses in a heap, to sodden and soused to move another inch. You wait while he sleeps it off a little. (FUMBLE!)
|You acquire an item: breaded beer|
|You gain some <substat>.|
Occurs at random locations during Drunksgiving. Scales to the player's stats.
- This monster cannot be copied.